Online dating is hit or miss, with more misses than hits. Men outnumber women on some sites by something like 4 to 1, and even on the more balanced sites, it’s still close to 2 to 1. So, as a woman on an online dating site, you can receive a lot of mail. The temptation is to simply delete the contact attempts from men that don’t appeal to you, but there is something inherently rude in that. So, match.com has this nifty little button that says “No, thanks.” When you get an email from someone you’re not interested in, good online etiquette dictates that you click the “No, thanks” button, rather than ignore your potential suitor.
My first few days on match.com, I got a lot of mail. (I’ve since realized that they must have an algorithm for making sure that new members get inundated and feel welcomed and popular, but I didn’t know that then. ) I was going through my mail and came across someone who didn’t interest me in the slightest. I was about to hit delete, and then I remembered the “No, thanks” button. I clicked it. Nothing happened. Hmmm….. I clicked it again. Still nothing. Maybe my mouse wasn’t working… Clicked it again. And again. Apparently the thing didn’t actually work, so I gave up on the “No, thanks” button and just deleted messages that didn’t interest me.
Except that it did work.
The following day, I opened my match.com inbox to discover a message from the man to whom I tried to send the “No, thanks” message. His message said, “Thanks so much for the reply, but I just wanted you to know that I got the hint the first time. By the fourth time, it was just kind of mean. Good luck to you.”
And so began my match.com adventure.